Parenting the Child You Didn't Expect While You Were Expecting: The Hero's Journey of Parenting Self-Guided Course
Welcome to Parenting the Child You Didn’t Expect While You Were Expecting - The Hero’s Journey of Parenting!
In any hero’s journey, there is a threshold that is crossed and that crossing is when the journey begins. The call to a wild, unknown adventure has been answered, consciously or unconsciously, and in this journey there are lessons to be learned in order to emerge as a more empowered person, more connected with what really matters in life.
Some threshold crossings are chosen and some are given to you without being asked. Either way, they forever change the course of your life.
When you are parenting a child who is not what you expected, the threshold crossing is not a conscious choice, at least it wasn’t for me. You might find yourself just on the other side of it unable to do anything but hope there is a way to go back to a life filled with more knowns than unknowns.
What you probably have figured out is that with this journey, there is no going back. You can choose to stay stuck in that place of wanting what will never be or you can choose to take one step at a time to move into the unknown and trust that all will be okay, that tools and teachers will present themselves to help you learn how to not only survive, but thrive.
This is what happened for me with my son and without even being aware of it, I stood for a long time on the other side of the threshold wanting to go back. I wanted easy. I wanted what I could understand. I wanted regular and normal. I loved my son more than anything and did all I could to support him but it wasn’t until I hit rock bottom that I was snapped awake to some powerful awarenesses of what he was here to teach me…and none of it had anything to do with him not being autistic.
Once awake, even though I had no idea what I was doing, I began stepping into the unknown. It couldn’t have been any worse than what I had been feeling - physically and emotionally exhausted. I had no idea what to expect, which had come to be a normal feeling. However this was totally different. Teachers, my son included, started presenting themselves with tools that were simple and basic yet more powerful than anything I had ever learned. These tools helped me to reconnect with myself which helped me to connect with my son.
When I crossed that threshold eleven years ago, I had no idea what the future would hold, but I could see a glimmer of hope. What I needed to do was move forward despite the anxiety and uncertainty and be open and curious through the journey.
In my wildest imagination I could never have thought that I’d be writing this for you; to support you in your journey by sharing the tools I’ve gathered to empower you when you might feel powerless, and by welcoming you to a community where you are not alone even in the darkest times.
Since you are here, I can only assume that you have crossed some threshold with a child in your life. Take my hand. I’m here without judgement, only love and gratitude that you have made the choice to move forward into the unknown. It won’t be easy but I will share with you what has helped me in parenting a child who is not at all what I expected when I was expecting.